I must accept there are some relationship "traps" I've been utterly seduced by...
This thought is a red flag: "Since he's so popular, now I -- by extension -- will have all the social support and resources I will ever need."
This is also not a good sign: "Thank god he has so much energy -- I'll finally have a clean kitchen, warm meals, and clean clothes!"
But, who could blame me for thinking I might steal some flame from a partner so garrulous, charismatic, agreeable, upbeat, and indefatigable as the two schlaviners I've loved (and been subsequently crushed by)?
I have my own fire, even if it's often decidedly parked under a bushel. These kinds of things are not transferable -- under any conditions. I have to play the hand I was dealt and no other. As DFW said, "although of course you end up becoming yourself."